Toast: To Opportunity (12/31)

December 31st

Toast: Who and what are you toasting to in 2012? 

Funny I should ask this, I just toasted - virtually - to a friend of mine in New York. It goes the same, I'm toasting to my friends (my friendships) and family. I'm toasting for success, love, and peace.

In the middle of it all, toasting to opportunity. 

Opportunity to spend more time talking with and spending time with friends and family.

Opportunity to do better at my job and learn new skills.

Opportunity to go on a date, or two, maybe, once in a while.

Opportunity to give back, volunteer, and help make the world a better place.

Hmm, maybe I should go back to yesterday's post and say the word for 2012 is opportunity!

Word: Was "Clarity" for 2011 (12/30)

December 30th

Word: Describe 2011 in one word. What’s your word for 2012? Why?

clar·i·ty/ˈklaritē/

Noun:	The quality of being clear, in particular. The quality of coherence and intelligibility.
Synonyms:	clearness - lucidity - perspicuity - definition

Yep, that's the word.

I saw things in a way I hadn't seen them before. That clarity also gave me a freedom. 

For 2012? I'm going with the word peace. You know, for myself, so that I can help those around me and give back and encourage peace in the world. 

Resolutions: Stuff I Should Already Be Doing (The Short List) (12/29)

December 29th

Resolutions: There are just two days left in this year, so what are your resolutions for 2012? What makes you think you’ll stick with it, or them, this year? Or, are you a naysayer of resolutions? 

I've never been one for successful resolutions.

Once, I decided I would have a novel written by the end of the year. That was twelve years ago. 

Then, there was the year I decided I would go to the gym four days a week for the entire year. Then, four days into the year I was hit with a nasty cold flu-virus-something and couldn't go to the gym at all!

When I think of the word "resolutions," I think of the phrase, "I resolve to."

Whenever something really disappointing happens at work, I'll say, "I  resolve to do" and then fill in the rest with something really important about how to make my abilities better.

When a friendship goes awry or a conversation sour, I'll say, "I resolve to listen more and talk less." Yet, even that doesn't seem to happen. Although, I do think that I am listening more.

As much as I would want to agree with young Calvin, I think there is some point to resolutions. The downside is that it's attached to a date on the calendar, when it should just come to us when we know we can do it. 

It seems to me that resolutions are often like revolutions. We are constantly coming up with them to better ourselves and the society we have around us. 

Once, I said I'd watch less television and use less of the Internet. I work in television news and a good percentage of my job has to do with social media. Who was I kidding?

I think it's best to start small. What are some simple resolutions? They're things that you don't necessarily have to do everyday, but behaviors you can gradually adopt. These, at least for me, are ones that I'm either planning to continue to do or hope to do. I'll make every effort to do them.

1. Volunteer
2. Donate Blood (you'll be surprised at how many people never have, even if they medically can)
3. Become an Organ Donor (if you can)
4. Smile more often and say hello
5. Say a prayer, or go to Church, and find some faith
6. Say "Please," and "Thank You" (Because, sadly, many of us failed that)
7. Pick up the phone and call someone once-in-awhile. (I promise you, they would like to talk with you)
8. Write a handwritten note and send it in the mail
9. Put myself in someone else's shoes (Or, in other words, shift my perspective once-in-a-while)
10. And finally, the one thing that we can all do, that I sought out to do last year, that can only make the rest of any of our resolutions worth while is to seek out to love ourselves more. That is to respect ourselves and know when to say no, when to turn down something that will overburden us, and when to accept something - despite the fear - when we know it's good for us. 

Gratitude: For the Family I Choose (12/28)

December 28th

Gratitude: Thanksgiving was last month, I know. However, as we near closer to the end of this year what is it that you’re truly thankful for? When and how do you feel gratitude? How do you show it? 

One of my favorite lines from any story is from Winnie The Pooh when Piglet came up to Pooh:

It's conversations like that I am most thankful for this year. Not only that, but being able to share the experiences with other people just as meaningful to me.

Over the long Christmas holiday weekend, I spent several hours up late polishing off a bottle of wine talking with my Mom. As an only child, there are times in which my conversations with her are the ones I would have with an older sister. That being said, because I am an only child I get to choose my siblings. I think so anyway. There's the saying that blood is thicker than water, but I believe love is thicker than blood. 

When my Grandma passed away just over 5 years ago, I wrote in what would be read at her funeral, that because she chose my Mom (through adoption), I was blessed to be her daughter. Love is thicker than blood.

I started talking to my Mom about a friend of mine who I would like to consider a brother, his wife, his young son and their families. Something about these people really just feels like family. It's one of those relationships where you pick up where you left off, have cried over nonsense, let time go by needlessly, and wake up in the morning knowing everything is going to be alright so long as they're in the world. 

This past summer, while on that same wonderful and memory-filled trip to Tennessee, a conversation reminiscent of the one between Piglet and Pooh took place.

It was the day of our mutual friend's wedding. My dear friend was a groomsmen, and his wife, with whom I'd spent much of the previous 36 hours getting to know for this first time and I were waiting in the honeymoon suite on the Delta Queen, where the wedding was taking place. We spent time in there leading up to the wedding - to avoid the drenching hot and humid weather - and immediately following.

To our credit, we were both hopped up on Twizzlers (you know, the candy), really bad food, and we were just hot. The two of us girls did our best to cool down and dry off after our seven minutes in the sun and eventually just crashed on the bed. It was the coolest spot in the room.

My dear friend came in, and had some Twizzlers, too.

He sat at a table while we relax on the bed. He looked up at us, and almost as concerned as a boy asking a girl for her phone number he said, "Now that you two have spent time together, what do you think?" 

We laughed, and we giggled. It was so important to him that we like each other, that it made the trip matter all that more. Even if it wasn't important, it felt important. 

I'm not even sure what I said, but I remember the moment, so much that I shared it with my own Mom. She, in turn, was just as grateful. After all, she knows what it's like to be chosen and knows what it is like to love.

In the end, it felt like Piglet just saying to Pooh, "I just wanted to be sure of you."

Encouragement: To Encourage Others (12/27)

December 27th

Encouragement: How were you encouraged in 2011? How did you encourage others? How do you need to be encouraged in 2012?

I felt it first when I arrived in Hawaii at the beginning of the year.

"What's a pretty girl like you doing here without a man?" Years ago, even months earlier, that would have not caught my attention. However, just the phrase "pretty girl" was enough to get me to listen. Encouragement came first, in 2011, in the form of attention. I wanted it and I needed it. 

"You have such strength," people would tell me about my circumstances. In a way, that strength meant courage, which in fact then turned around and encouraged me some more. 

I felt it later when I was at a gathering amongst co-workers who would become new friends.

A restaurant that I had only been to a few times was closing its doors, so I decided to "rally the troops" and encourage some of my colleagues to join me for dinner. The restaurant ended up closing its doors a day earlier, so someone else suggested another restaurant. When 13 of us sat around the table and I realized that I'd never been at a table with 12 other people before, I was encouraged. The experience prompted me to want to invite more people over and respond more to invitations. [Of course, the inviting part on my end of the coin seems to have lapsed into this upcoming new year, but I had good intentions.]

It did that, even when some unexpected people showed up, prompting a mixture of pride and absolute absurd childlike behavior on my part. Perhaps, I needed to be more encouraged to be an adult.  

It goes without saying nott all the encouragement people could give me, or I would receive, was enough for me to really and fully be encouraged. I still hit my own personal emotional rock bottom and thought I wasn't seeing any more encouragement. But, it was just my perspective.

Now, I'm reminded of how others encouraged me in how I encourage others. Only, I do it almost explicitly as I would want for myself.

Late this year, a friend of mine showed signs of needing a friend. I don't have to know all the details, but if you want to give them to me - then at the most - that person has let it off their chest. If it's the kind of thing that warrants advice or emergency counseling, then I make the proper referrals. 

In 2012, I need encouragement just as most people in their thirties: professionally and personally. Encouragement to be better than I already am at my job and to be intellectually and emotionally attractive (and open) to the idea of dating.

Mostly, though, I just need encouragement to encourage others. 

Gifts: I Didn't Think It Was About That (12/26)

December 26th

Gifts: What did you get this year? What did you give? 

The real gifts of this year has ben in spending time. A year ago, I made a resolution of sorts to like myself more in 2011. I think I did a lot of that, and by doing that was able to give more of myself to others.

I have truly come to believe that real gifts are in memories shared, experienced had, and time spent. 

Meaning: Not Found Underneath the Tree (12/25)

December 25th

Meaning: What’s the meaning of Christmas for you? Why? 

The meaning of Christmas, for me, is a lot about the Tradition of Christmas. 

Yet, this is the best answer:

It's not about the presents underneath the Christmas tree. It's about family and friends (especially the ones who will be with you in the end. The Christian meaning of Christmas transcends into all friendships and relationships during this holiday time. We forgive, or forget, each other's wrongs. We let pass the time passed, and bridge the geographical distance, and we share, we love, and we spend time together. That's the lesson lived from a loving God. We know as much as we all know about one another and love one another anyway. That's one of the most important meanings, for me, of Christmas.